Weekly Teaching Moment: Selfless Service

I found this profound quote this week in my studies.  It helps me focus on what is most important.  “You wonderful sisters render compassionate service to others for reasons that supersede desires for personal benefits.  In this you emulate the Savior, who, though a king, did not seek position, nor was he concerned about whether others noticed Him.  He did not bother to compete with others.  His thoughts were always tuned to help others.  He taught, healed, conversed with, and listened to others.  He knew that greatness had little to do with outward signs of prosperity or position.  He taught and lived by this doctrine. ‘He that is greatest among you shall be your servant.’”  Dieter F. Utchdorf (Daughters In My Kingdom)

“The mediocre teacher tells.  The good teacher explains.  The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.”  William Arthur Ward.  The Savior, our greatest teacher, inspires us with His selfless example of love and service.

Thank you! You wonderful sisters for your examples of selfless service-

Love, Tanya  Yancey

Arlington Stake Primary President

Daughters in My Kingdom

A couple of times a week I have been reading our new book from the first Presidency and General Relief Society Presidency, entitled,“Daughters in My Kingdom.”  I have enjoyed it so much that I took a copy to a neighbor who has been inactive for many years.  I asked her to read it and tell me what she thought.  A few weeks later, I returned to her home and asked what she thought of the book.  Her response was, “Wow! LDS women are amazing!  I didn’t know all that about the Relief Society.”  She consequently asked her non-member daughter if she wanted to become part of Relief Society. 

I loved how Sister Beck put it when she said that, "the work of RS is the work of salvation among all of our Fathers children and that by serving in Primary and YW you are fully engaged in the purposes of RS." 

Will you please study this wonderful book and encourage the women in primary to do so also?  Share with them your experiences in reading it and then follow up with them to see if they did.  I know that as you study this book, you and the primary leaders and teachers will feel like an essential part of the Relief Society and your testimony and understanding of this great organization will increase.  The Lord will pour out His Love and blessings upon you.

Tanya Yancey

Arlington Stake Primary President

Simplify

“We human beings have a strange tendency to complicate simple things. We set up rules, laws, bylaws, processes, and subprocesses. Eventually, we pile up load after load until we end up under a huge weight of expectations that are so complicated it is difficult to keep track of them, let alone meet them.” -Pres. Uchtdorf (Acting on the Truths of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, Worldwide Leadership Training, February 2012) 

Do you ever get so caught up in the details of your calling that you neglect or put important family matters on hold? Sisters, this is not the Lord’s plan. There is one calling in life from which we will never be released. That is the calling of wife and mother. But neither does this mean that our responsibilities in our callings must suffer. The Lord will provide a way for us to do all that He asks (see 1 Nephi 3:5-7), and he does not wish for us to neglect our families as we serve. 

May I suggest that there are a few principles we would do well to follow as we seek to fulfill our responsibilities in our families and in our callings? 
* Slow down while still being diligent. (Mosiah 4:27)
 * Simplify. (Alma 37:6) 
* Invite the Spirit. (Alma 17:3 and D&C 50:13-14) 

In the Worldwide Leadership Training from February 2011, there is a wonderful example which I would like to draw your attention to. In the following link at about 2 minutes 30 seconds in, there is a video which talks about spiritual preparation. http://www.lds.org/broadcasts/watch/worldwide-leadership-training/2011/02?lang=eng&vid=779971295001&pkey=AQ%2E%2E,AAAAD5C7cik%2E,NkEKrBzbuXJBcGJrgsDFjLEiJ-nXhUBl&pid=610705729001 

What I loved about this video is how it showed that this sister fulfilled her responsibilities for her calling “while continuing to put the needs of her own family first” and “while applying the things she was learning in her own life”. Sisters we can serve and receive inspiration for our callings while taking care of our families and while fulfilling our own personal spiritual needs. Sisters, let us slow down and simplify our lives. And then let us be sure that we are doing those things which invite the spirit into our lives. We all know what those things are. I know that as we do this and seek to care for our families’ needs and especially our own spiritual needs first--even as we are pondering on how to best meet the needs of those we serve in our callings--we will be blessed with inspiration throughout our day and the Lord will give us direction and answers line up line as we need them. 
Thank you for your diligence, your care and concern for the children and families in your wards, and for your carefulness in living close to the spirit. These things bless the lives of us all. May the Lord continue to bless us each in our efforts, and may our families also be blessed as we serve. 

My love to you all. 
-Sister Colburn 

Serving Families

In our latest Worldwide Leadership training, we were given counsel concerning families. Consider these words from President Nelson’s talk.

“Our task to defend the family is not an easy one. Trends in the world diminish the significance of the family.”

“In reality, we are raising our children in enemy-occupied territory. The homes of our members must become the primary sanctuaries of our faith, where each can be safe from the sins of the world.”

“Three times in sacred scripture the warning is made that “the whole earth would be utterly wasted” at the Lord’s return if certain conditions were not in place (see D&C 2:3; 138:48; Joseph Smith—History 1:39). In each instance, that warning relates to the condition of the human family without the sealing ordinances of the temple. Without these ordinances of exaltation, the purposes of creation would not be realized.”

Those are pretty powerful words on the importance of families. As we serve the children in our Primaries, we must always keep in mind that we are serving families. In line with counsel from this same meeting, we must seek first to understand (see Elder Uchtdorf’s talk). Consider, what are you doing to understand the needs of the families in your ward? What are you doing to “turn the hearts of the children to their fathers” (Malachi 4:5-6)? What are you doing to support families, to help the children to feel supported within their families? We must be careful that we do not attempt to reach past or supplant the parent in order to reach the child. This may sometimes be difficult with some families, but I know that as we seek the Lord’s help we can find ways to strengthen the families of all children in our Primaries...remembering that the child’s family is and needs to be their primary sanctuary from the “enemy-occupied territory” of the world and that “no other instrumentality can take its place.” (see The Family: A Proclamation To The World).

Thank you for all of your tireless effort in serving the children and their families. Often it is through the child that the parent will be reached and brought into activity. This was so in the case of my own husband, and it has been an immense blessing in the lives of my children and in my own life. I am ever thankful for it.

My love to you.

-Sister Colburn

Preparing Spiritually and Teaching by the Spirit

The following video teaches us about the importance of preparing spiritually in our callings and in our families. http://www.lds.org/service/leadership/prepare-spiritually?lang=eng
I love the scripture which was used to begin the video.
“And when he had sent the multitudes away, he went up into a mountain apart to pray: and when the evening was come, he was there alone.” Matthew 14:23

It brings to mind another scriptural account which is similar.

“And it came to pass about an eight days after these sayings, he took Peter and John and James, and went up into a mountain to pray.” Luke 9:28

The first scripture is a great reminder and example to us to take time out for spiritual communion and feasting so that we can be better prepared to teach with the spirit. The second is similar, only this time Jesus takes his disciples with him. We too can bring those we teach with us to as we “go up into a mountain to pray”. We can help those whom we teach to feel the spirit so that they also say as Peter did “it is good for us to be here”. (Luke 9:33)

Consider these words from ‘Teaching, No Greater Call concerning the importance of the Spirit in our teaching.

“The spirit of God speaking to the spirit of man has power to impart truth with greater effect and understanding than the truth can be imparted by personal contact even with heavenly beings. Through the Holy Ghost the truth is woven into the very fibre and sinews of the body so that it cannot be forgotten.”
– Joseph Fielding Smith (Teaching, No Greater Call, p. 41)

“If you accomplish nothing else in your relationship with your students than to help them recognize and follow the promptings of the Spirit, you will bless their lives immeasurably and eternally.”
–Elder Richard G. Scott (Teaching, No Greater Call, p. 48)

“Parents and teachers, our efforts to help our children establish a heritage of rich spiritual memories are never wasted...They will remember what they know and what they have felt. They will remember their identity as children of Heavenly Father, who sent them here with a divine purpose.”
–Sister Susan L. Warner, former counselor in Primary general presidency (Teaching, No Greater Call, p. 6)

I know that as you prepare yourselves spiritually, you will have the ability to bring a feast to those whom you teach so that they will desire to know what you know, and to feel what you feel...and you will aid them in knowing and feeling of the spirit in their own lives. This is the essence of all good teaching.

My love to you.
-Sister Colburn

Enriching lessons with Church-Produced Resources

"I have spoken before about the importance of keeping the doctrine of the Church pure, and seeing that it is taught in all our meetings.  I worry about this.  Small aberrations in doctrinal teaching can lead to large and evil falsehoods."  Gordon B. Hinkley

There are some wonderful ways that teachers can enrich their lessons while still relying on church-produced resources.

Did you know that the church has a new resource page where they have linked relevant articles with from  The Friend with current lessons?  

Click here to be directed to a new page at www.lds.org with links to enrichment materials.

There is also a an index of coloring pages from The Friend.  You can search by subject to find coloring pages for almost any lesson.  Click here  This index is more comprehensive that what is currently at lds.org

A member of the church also created an index for the lesson manuals with links to past articles from The Friend.  The list was compiled a while ago so some of the links are broken.  Click here to go to the page.

Creating a stress management plan

Working in Primary can be challenging.  Every Ward in the Stake has children who have a difficult time in Primary due to developmental needs, emotional needs, social special needs or just plain bad days.  Having a plan for what to do when difficult behavior occurs can greatly reduce your stress.  I’ve found that anytime I can think through a potential problem in a quiet moment, I always have more success when the problem arises.  We encourage you to spend a bit of time in one of your Presidency meetings coming up with a stress management plan.  

What can you include in your plan?  

Prevention
Begin by thinking of what you can do to diminish stressful situations in your primary.  Some Wards dismiss the Primary workers while the remaining congregation sings a song.  This allows the leaders and teachers to be in the Primary room ready to receive the children with smiles and direct them to their seats.  Some Primaries hand children who have difficulty sitting still something they can manipulate (like a koosh ball) to give their busy little bodies something to do in their seats.  Many Primaries have a special signal to let the children know that they are getting too loud or busy.  With some children, you can have a plan to walk from the front of the room and stand near them while teaching in order to help them be quiet.  

If you continue to have a difficult time with an individual child, contact the parent.   The parent knows their child best and can educate you about the best way to help their child.

“If a child or youth has a pattern of disruptive behavior, seek the help of his or her parents.  Parents want to know about their children’s behavior, and they are willing to help.  If possible, include the young person in these conversations; this will show your respect for his or her maturity and agency.  Together you can make specific plans and later review your progress.”  (Teaching No Greater Call pg. 86)  

Pray for the child in your personal and as a Presidency.  Ask for inspiration in how to meet their needs and ask to be filled with charity towards the child.

What kinds of things can you plan to implement in your Primary to prevent stressful situations?

Dealing with stress when it arrives
Even with planning, you are still going to have days where children misbehave and you become frustrated.  Have a plan for how you can lessen your own stress so you can respond to children with love and patience.  The most difficult thing is to recognize when you are getting to the end of your rope.  Being self aware can help you realize that you need to implement your stress management plan.  

Remember the words of Brigham Young, “Never chasten beyond the balm you have within you to bind up”.  

What kinds of things might you include in your plan?

1.  As you notice that a particular child’s (or entire Primary’s) behavior is really bothering you, close your eyes and slowly count to ten.  Take a deep breath.  Say a quick prayer that the Spirit will guide you and strengthen you.
2.  If the behavior continues to cause you stress, ask another member of the Presidency or a teacher to address the situation.
3.  Give yourself permission to take a time out.  Communicate with the other members of the Presidency and take the time to leave the situation, get a drink of water, walk outside, do whatever you need to de-escalate the stress in yourself.
4.  If the child continues to misbehave, it may be necessary to bring the child to his/her parent or to invite the parent to come attend Primary with their child.  

By creating a plan for dealing with stressful situations in Primary, you will be able to follow the council in D&C 121:43   “Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;”

“In applying this counsel, it is helpful to understand the words betimes and sharpness.  Betimes means promptly or in good time.  In this passage, sharpness refers to the need to give clear, well-defined instructions.  

You should be gentle and meek when giving correction.  Note that reproving should be done only “when moved upon by the Holy Ghost” and should be followed by an increase of love.”  (Teaching No Greater Call, pg. 86)

We, the Stake Primary Presidency, love you and pray for you.  We are inspired by the ways you reach out to the children in your Ward and seek to draw them to Christ.  Thank you for your service.

Stephanie Dickson
secretary